Do you have a Child who Hoards?

For as long as I’ve known anything about kids, I have known that they love their belongings. Whether it is toys, clothes, or crafts – kids usually have some measure of emotional attachment to their things. What makes children hoarders different from the others? Kids who hoard tend to get very emotionally attached to their things, more so than other children, and often are overly attached to the things that other children wouldn’t think twice about discarding.

When Does Hoarding Develop in Kids?

Hoarding behaviours can appear in children as young as 6 or 7 years old and usually appears alongside another anxiety disorder such as OCD. However, hoarding disorder, which is a diagnosable disorder, cannot be diagnosed at such a young age. Children are more likely to be diagnosed with hoarding disorder in their tweens and teens.

What Behaviours Might You See in Children Hoarders?

Hoarding among children looks different than adults. They do not have an entire house that they are able to fill – the hoarding is usually kept within the confines of their bedroom. Perhaps their closet is stuffed full, drawers unusable, bed unsleepable and desk unfindable. However, children hoarders aren’t defined as such by their mess – after all, it is common and normal for children to be messy. No, children hoarders are defined as such by how they feel about their possessions.

Kids who hoard will show extreme anxiety when their things are cleaned up or thrown away. This anxiety may present itself as tantrums – crying, yelling, lashing out in panic, kicking or hitting caregivers and parents. It is also common for a child who hoards to feel embarassed and / or uncomfortable letting people see or touch their things.

It is important to also understand that hoarding in children does not eb and flow; hoarding is chronic and their hoarding behaviours will remain consistent.

Where Does Hoarding Behaviour in Kids Come From?

Children can develop hoarding behaviours after a traumatic event – perhaps losing all of their belongings in a home fire or being taken away from their parents under some extraordinary circumstances. It is common, also, for children of hoarders to hoard as well.

Studies have shown that about 50% of individuals who hoard, have a relative who also hoards.

Treatment for Children who Hoard

Set Safe Limits – Parents can create allowable limits within the child’s alloted space for your items. For example, allow your child to keep only as many toys as will fit into their toybox or stuffies as can fit into the stuffy holder on the back of their door. If an additional toy comes into the space, another can be donated.

Create a Reward System – If discarding an item is difficult, create a rewards system for your child so that potential feelings of anxiety that come with parting with possessions is replaced by a feeling of accomplishment or contentedness. It is suggested that the reward system focus on experiences so as not to give your child more things.

Therapy – Some children may benefit from cognitive behaviour therapy to help them understand why they are hoarding. This would be appropriate with older children – in or close to their teen years – who have the ability to think and rationalize through compulsions.

Treating Parents – Sometimes, in order to treat children who hoard, we need to assess and treat their parents. This is especially true if parents have not been diagnozed but meet the clinical criteria for hoarding.

If you are a parent of a child with hoarding disorder, seek to understand the reason your child is hoarding (which will take the assistance of a professional) as the place to start in your helping journey. Just because child hoarding is not commonly talked about, does not mean it isn’t common.